Anewstudy,aimedatdiscoveringthepositiveeffectsofbreak-ups,hassuggestedittakesthreemonthstogetoverarelationshipfallingapart.一项致力于寻找分手积极作用的新研究发现，三个月的时间可以使人从一段破裂的感情中走出来。ResearchpublishedinUSmagazine,TheJournalofPositivePsychology,foundthatittakes11weekstofeelthebeneficialeffectsofarelationshipsplit.这项研究刊登于美国杂志《积极心理学》学刊，发现分手后11周人们会感受到积极效果。Thisfollowspreviousfindingsthatitcouldtakeuptosixmonthstobeabletomoveon.此前有研究称人们分手六个月后才能恢复正常生活。GaryLewandowskiandNicoleBizzocoofMonmouthUniversity,NewJersey,questioned155peoplewhohadbeenthroughabreak-upinthelastsixmonths.新泽西州蒙莫斯大学的盖里·莱万多夫斯基（GaryLewandowski）和尼克尔·比佐科（NicoleBizzoco）询问了155个在过去六个月内分手的人。Theyfoundthat71percentofpeoplebegantoseethepositivesinthesplitinjustashortperiodoftime.他们发现71%的人在短时间内就已经开始看到分手的积极影响。Thosewho'vemadeitthroughtheinitialthreemonthsafterabreakaredescribedashavingleft'therecoveryzone',aperiodofpainfuladjustmentandhealing.三个月内走出阴影的被认为是摆脱了“恢复期”，这是一段充满痛苦和治愈的时期。LewandowskiandBizzocofoundthatpeoplestartedtofeelbetteraboutthemselvesanddevelopedstrongcopingstrategiesbeyondthe11weekmark.莱万多夫斯基和比佐科发现11周后人们开始感觉良好并且变积极应对。However,thisresearchmayonlyapplytoshorttermrelationships.Adifferentstudythatquestionedhowlongitwouldtakecouplestogetoveradivorcefoundthetimeframewassignificantlylonger.然而，这一研究只适用于短期关系。另一项夫妻需多久走出离婚阴影的研究发现，这需要比11周长很多的时间。DatingsiteFiftiesfoundthatittakesanaverageof18monthstogetoveramarriagebreakdown,whichissixlongerthanLewandowskiandBizzoco'sestimate.交友网站Fifties发现，婚姻破裂后人们平均需要18个月来恢复，是莱万多夫斯基和比佐科预计的六倍。Thismaybebecauseamarriageisconsideredamoreseriouscommitment.Ofthosequestionedbythewebsiteoneinsixsaidtheyfoundithardtodealwiththefeelingsoffailure.这也许是因为婚姻更为严肃，该网站调查的人中，有六分之一表示他们难以面对失败的感觉。Andwhile43percentofpeoplesaidthattheyfeltasenseofreliefwhentheirdivorcecamethrough31percentsaidthattheystillfeltasenseofsadness.43%的人表示自己离婚后感觉到了解脱，31%的人会感到沮丧。Ifyoufindyourselfsuddenlyalone,don'tdespair.RelationshipexpertandselfhelpguruDrPamSpurrgiveshertipsforhealingtheheartache...如果你突然觉得孤独，不要失望，恋爱专家和自助专家帕姆·斯普尔（PamSpurr）博士给出了治疗心痛的意见：1.Don'tblameyourself不要自责Remindyourselfregularlythattherelationshipendedbecauseyourpartnerhadtheproblemwithcommunicating,whichwasnothingtodowithyou.Youwerewillingandabletotalkaboutyourproblemsbutyourpartnercouldn'tdealwiththat...whichistheirloss.经常提醒自己，你们关系的终结是由于对方不善于沟通，与你无关。你愿意与对方探讨自己的问题，但他无力解决，这是他的损失。2.Takeupsomethingnew找些新乐子It'simportantthatit'scompletelyunrelatedtoyourex,andevenbetterifit'ssomethingtheydidn'twantyoutodo!Somanypeoplewho'vehadthesesortofbreak-upskeepdoingthesamethingstheydidwiththeirex,whichjustincreasestheirpain.Leavethosethingsuntilmuchlater,whenthepainofthebreak-uphasfaded.这些事必须与你的前任毫无关系，最好是他不愿让你做的事！很多人分手后做着和从前一样的事，这只会徒增痛苦，把那些事留到以后做吧，直到分手的痛苦消失。3.Dateforfun为了开心去约会Now'snotthetimetolookforanothermeaningfulrelat...