HappyInOurOwnSkin?Ormaybethequestionis,canyouthinkofatimewhenyoudidn’tfeeluncomfortablewithyourbody?Thethingis,mostofusareonanegativefeedbackloopwhenitcomestoourbodies–whichgenerallytranslatesasafeelingnotbeinghappyinourownskin.Thebiggerpictureofthisisthatwespendalotofourtimeworryingaboutwhatwedo/don’teat,howmuchwedo/don’texercise.Inshort,wehaveourheadsfullofbodyneuroses.I’dalreadydecidedtowritethispiecewhenIreadanintheGuardianWeekendsupplementwrittenbyyoungfeministwriter,RhiannonLucyCosslett(co-founderofthewebsitevagendamagazinearant-y,freethinking,somefunnybacklashagainsttheincreasinglypurilegossipnatureofglossyweeklies).InherGuardianpiece,Cosslettwritesaboutbattleswithherownbody,onlytooawareoftheirony:feministwriterwithbodyissues.Shegoesontomentionthephenomenonof‘almostanorexia’orundiagnosedeatingdisorderswhichaffectthemajorityofwomeninsomeformofunhealthybodyimageoranxietieswithfood.Also,orthorexianervosa,theso-calledobsessionwitheatinghealthily,nottomention‘fitspiration’thein-your-facesocialmediafuelledcrazeforachievingtheperfectbodythroughexercise.Thatthere’sagenerationofwomenwhodon’twanttobeseentobedietingassuch(infact,they’reanti-diet)butareusingthesmokescreenofgreensmoothie,flaxseed,juicedetoxesinstead.Italladdsuptothesamething.Thelongingtobethin,havetheperfectbodyendsupmakingusalltoohardonourselves.Weliveinavisualage–we’resurroundedbybikini-Selfies,andcleanerthancleanhealthistasonInstagram.Nowonderwehavethesebodyneuroses,particularlyyoungerwomenwho’regrowingupwiththepressuresocialmedia,andotherformsofmediacanbring.Crossletaskstheinspirationalwriterandpsychotherapist,SusieOrbachwhatwecandoaboutthis,andOrbach’sreplyis,‘IguessthequestionI’daskis:howlongareyougoingtoputupwithit?’.Goodquestion.Theanswer,ononehand,isincrediblycomplex.Muchofhowwefeelaboutourselvesistodowithourownpschologicalmake-up–patternswhichsetinduringchildhood,andwhichcantakeyearstobecomeapparentanddealwith.Unravellingourdeeppsycheispossiblewithtimeandtherightsupport,andiscrucialparticularlyinregardstoveryseriouseatingdisorders.Forthegeneralbodyanxietymostofusseemtobetouchedby,thingscouldbealotsimplerperhaps,asOrbachseemstobesaying.It’saboutchangingourthinking,ourattitudes,ourhabits.Weliveinanageandacountrywherewearefreeenoughtohavechoices–togetgreatjobs,buyourownhomes,marrywhowechooseornot.Surelywecanmakethedecisiontofollowdubioushealth‘gurus’onTwitter/Instagram.Ornot.FacebookandSelfiesarenotcompulsory.Noriswearingabikini.So,perhapsit’stimetoputthingsinperspective.Ofcourse,intryingtofindourownbodyconfidence,therewillbegoodandbaddays.Butitbeginswithawareness.Whenweareagonisingaboutthesizeofourthighsinthemirrororlaunchingourselvesintoayetanotherpost-weekend,Mondaymorning‘diet’,let’sjuststop,takeabreathandaskourselveswhy.Whoarewedoingthisfor?Canwebekindertoourselves?Ifwe’veover-eaten,sobeit,andpossiblybreakfastreallyisn’tneededthismorning,butdon’tletthatruinlunchortheday.Andokso,themajorityofusdon’thavethighslikeGiselle’sintheNo5ad,butthensheisanexception.Bemindfulintheexerciseyoutake,thefoodyoueat,andhowyoutreatyourbodyandyouwillbesurprisedathowmuchbetteryouwillfeelaboutyourself.